my question answered

The happiest days of my life have been many. Marrying my husband has to be among the top. We have been married now for 39 years. It was not always smooth. With his, mine and ours, it was a struggle at times. We both brought baggage from past experiences, but I knew that he was a good man, and that he would always be faithful.
He has never let me down. He has been a good provider, worked hard and has put up with all of the crazy things that I do and say. I truly do love him.
Also among the top are our children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. Oh how we love them.


One of the saddest days of my life was around 43 years ago. The day I got a telephone call from a funeral home. The words were like daggers to my heart. "could you please come down and identify the body of your husband. He was found dead this morning!

He also was the love of my life. But because of alcohol and drug addiction, he was gone. We were separated at the time, with divorce papers in the works. We had a beautiful daughter of about 4 mo. old. I had 2 other sweet boys from another marriage that had failed. I didn't know how I was ever going to pick up the pieces of my broken heart. I knew when I married Dale, that he had had problems with alcoholand drugs, (because he told me.) He said he couldn't promise but had to take one day at a time.

For the first 6 months Our marriage was wonderful. He was so kind and loving to my boys. Then our world fell apart. Being a truck driver, he went out on a run. I expected him home around noon so I invited his parents to come to lunch.

We waited and waited, but he did not come. Finally the phone rang and he ask to speak to his Dad. His Dad said "Oh no! Please come home son.

That was the starting of a road of misery and heartache. He started drinking again.

From the time he was a small boy he started getting hystimine headaches. His parents had taken him even to Mayo Brothers clinic to see what they could do to help him. Nothing helped. So he started getting pain pills and shots from the doctors.
And then he discovered drinking. It helped to numb the pain. So between the drinking and drugs he became addicted.

When he couldn't get the pain pills, he would drink, He could go sober for awhile and then go on binges.

a few months before he died, he came to me and said that I just as well get the divorce started because he just couldn't change. He said if a Dr. told him that he would die if he took another drink, he would still have to do it because the compulsion was that strong. Heartbroken I started proceedings. One month before it would be final, I got the terrifying call.

His parents were in Hawaii at the time. As I stood in front of him, the tears streamed down my face as I realized for the first time in months, he looked at peace. My Dale was gone. When I found his car there was a note inside for me. he said how much he loved me and that he was sorry that he couldn't make it. He told me what to do with the income taxes and other things. There were pills all over the floor in the back seat. The Death certificate said exasperated vomit. His brother and I knew different.

For 10 years I lived with quilt and anguish. What I could have done to make things different?

Some years later as I was having one of those days of feeling sorry for myself. I knelt down and prayed for help and peace. That night I had a dream. dale appeared to me and said, Charlene can you ever forgive me for what I did to you? He looked so sad.
I said, "oh yes, Dale you were forgiven a long time ago. He looked relieved and then said." It wasn't all in vein was it?" We have a beautiful daughter. Please tell her I love her.

When my daughter graduated from nursing school, at the graduation. I felt as if he was sitting right next to me and I felt his happiness, for his daughter.

So you see I have had joy and despair. My life is one of happiness now and I am at peace.